Tuesday, 07 July 2009
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Timeout
I thought I would be more ambitious this summer, but I think this slow pace is healthy. It's given me time to think. During the school year I have to start the day so early to enjoy quiet moments before the rest of the family wakes up. This feels like a mental vacation.
I've come to a few decisions with all this thinking time. I'm learning that my carefree, dreamy personality also keeps me from completing projects. But after reading the book, "Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World," I was inspired to focus on one thing at a time. By asking God, "What do YOU want me to do next?" I can appreciate every small gesture and embrace those childish interruptions. I believe that God gives us each moment for a reason, and I don't want to waste my gifted life.
After such a great trip to visit family a couple of weeks ago, I enjoyed the growing independence of my kids. They slept in the same room, giggling, keeping each other company, and playing quietly together in the early morning. I felt the freedom of not being as needed, so that I could concentrate on other things. This brought the realization that I could be done having babies. I never wanted to have only 2 kids, but I have always wanted to adopt or foster. So I am hoping that we will be in a position to start that process in a few years. I still want to fill up this house with family.
After a series at our church entitled "Jesus Creed," I started trying to meditate on the words, "Love God, your God, with your whole heart: love Him with all that's in you, love Him with all you've got" and "Love others as you love yourself." It goes along with my prayer to ask God what HE wants me to do. With such a focused mindset, it helps me avoid unnecessary distractions, but see every task as a divine appointment. To be less hurried, less stressed, and feel less pressured.
Happy vacation.
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